The Swan's Song
by sihasacrossthesea
Summary: Shepard wakes up in a hospital long after the destruction of the Reapers to find many surprises waiting for her. Most were wonderful, but others were... troubling. As she spends time celebrating with old friends and becoming used to a certain new joy in her life, she searches for the final words of the Reapers, seeking answers that she had never been given.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER—PLEASE READ:**

_I do not guarantee that the scientific occurrences in any of the chapters of this story, pertaining to the Mass Effect universe or not, are canon/factual_.

I did as much research as I could, otherwise I mostly just implemented my own headcanons and wrote as I saw fit. This is all just for the fun of creativity.

Thanks for reading!

* * *

Gradually, her surroundings became perceptible. Soon she gained awareness of small noises amidst the silence, and later began to notice a strong smell. Her body and mind were a vessel slowly powering back up after an abiding lack of fuel. Slowly, as more and more energy was infused into its system, the vessel began to regain functionality, and eventually one could hear the constant, subtle hum of its engines again. She felt as if she was awakening from a century-long slumber; her body was energized and capable, yet her mind was still slow to reacquire complete sentience.

Soon she was able to subconsciously identify the stimuli; a soft beeping noise, the feeling of cushions and bed sheets along with tight and restricting casts around parts her body, and a very familiar smell of immaculate chemicals and materials. She felt the rigid stillness of her muscles, and began to slightly clench and release her hands and feet. A strong sunlight poured into the room and she felt a calming warmth kiss her skin. She let out a soft groan as her sense of pain resurfaced. After a few moments, she began to panic as her thoughts resurfaced and then scrambled in disorientation and terror.

Reapers. Galaxy. Death. Crucible…

"_The Reapers will be destroyed?"_

"_Yes. But the peace won't last."_

EDI. Joker. Geth. Remorse.

She opened her eyes fully now. Her eyes darted around the room, though she felt pain in raising her head. Now fully awake, she realized that she was a patient in a hospital. Her previous thoughts subsided to make way for new questions. The last thing she remembered before waking up was being in the blast of the crucible. Where was she now? If she's alive and being taken care of, did the galaxy survive? Is it over? She felt a sudden surge of melancholic denial. Those thoughts seemed to be delusions, not possibilities. She had spent what seemed her whole life being the galaxy's sword and shield. She's Commander Shepard, the hero of the galaxy and defender of humanity. It seemed unreal that immediate danger and imminent death just wasn't an issue anymore. Safety and peace were things that she wasn't permitted to feel since she was very young.

The door opened and a strained yet focused human nurse stood in the doorway, her steps interrupted, holding a datapad which she nearly dropped in astonishment upon meeting Shepard's opened eyes and upright position.

"Oh my god," she muttered quickly and quietly, staring at Shepard for a few more moments "Doctor!" She called out as she hastily ran off in another direction. In those short seconds, Shepard could see other corridors of the hospital, along with other doctors who peered into her own room from a distance with astonished looks. "Doctor! It's Shepard, she's—!"

The door shut, followed by another brief silence as Shepard's thoughts scrambled again.

"Commander," blared a hopeful and remarkably familiar voice on an intercom, "can you hear me?"

"Yeah, I…"Shepard replied out loud, placing her hand on her head as it began to throb slightly, "Doctor…Doctor Chakwas? That you?"

"Oh my god," she said, exasperatedly as though a lifetime of waiting had come to a closure, and she needed a few moments to realize and adjust to the change. Momentarily, the door opened. Alongside the same nurse she'd seen before stood Doctor Chakwas.

"Commander," Chakwas said with what seemed both happiness and disbelief, "My god, I'm speechless…" Chakwas and the nurse shared an expression of joy.

"Are the Reapers gone? H-How long have I been out?"

Within their joyful expressions, an obvious undertone of pity emerged. "The Reapers are long gone, Commander. Thanks to you, the galaxy is safe."

"Already?" Shepard's voice trailed off and she paused for a brief moment. Chakwas and the nurse grew more pitiful. "Doctor, how long have I been out?"

Chakwas looked down for a moment before answering. "Three years, Shepard," she said faintly, "you've missed… a lot."

There was an uncomfortable silence as the news slowly sunk into Shepard's mind. Three years. More than enough time for the people she cares about to preoccupy themselves with work and drift away from her. She needed to know where they were. More importantly, she needed to see Liara again; she needed to see that she was alive and okay. She needed confirmation that her love for her was still mutual.

"Delilah," Chakwas turned to the nurse, "I have to contact the Alliance. Make sure everything stays quiet. We cannot let the press know about this. She needs time for a full recovery, not an interrogation."

"Of course. Right away, ma'am."

"I'll be back in a minute, Shepard." Chakwas and Delilah both walked out of the room in opposite directions, the door shutting behind them once again.

Shepard turned around to look through the window behind her. Her mouth was agape with astonishment and an inexplicable relief; she saw a city in broad daylight with people, almost all humans, walking here and there, talking and laughing, smiling and frowning, working and playing… simply carrying on with their lives. Buildings new and intact, with a few construction sites in view. In the distance, she saw two very familiar structures; Big Ben and the London Eye.

Earth.

For the first time that she could remember, Shepard felt soft, slow tears of joy trickling down her cheeks. A few minutes ago, this city was nothing but ruin, rubble, and a collection of traumatizing memories of the many lives forever lost. Now it was just London again. People could finally begin to live life unafraid of impending death. They finally had the privilege to mourn, to learn to live and be happy again. Yet even amidst this amazing portrayal of recovery, Shepard could not help but to question its reality, to see it as a dream and an illusion. For many years, complete safety had been firmly unattainable, and suddenly she finds herself awakening within its embrace.

Minutes passed before Chakwas reentered the room. "Commander, I've contacted the Alliance. Admiral Hackett sends his best wishes. I've also contacted Liara. She was so happy, I could have sworn she was crying. She says she'll visit you as soon as possible."

Shepard's expression lit up, relieved to know not only that Liara would be here soon, but that she still cared. That was enough to set her heart at ease.

"Also, I've contacted Joker. He was delighted, and he said he'd get a hold of the rest of the old crew."

"Old?"

The pitiful undertone in her expression returned. "Things have changed, Commander. But not a soul in this galaxy could forget about you."

"Thank you, Doctor." Shepard turned and looked out the window again. "This is… unbelievable."

"Believe it, Commander," she said with praise, "we were only able to do this because you were there to fire the Crucible."

"I didn't get there alone." Shepard paused briefly as her thoughts began scrambling once again. "Doctor, how am I alive? How did I survive the Crucible's explosion?"

"Well, you'd have to ask Cerberus," she chuckled, "but they're all dead!"

"Was it because of the upgrades they gave me when they brought me back?"

Chakwas shrugged. "In all honesty, Commander, we have no idea. That's the only possible explanation we have. We don't even know how you got back down to Earth."

Shepard paused, scrunching her eyebrows and placing a hand on her throbbing head. "Wait, wait, wait a minute—you found me on _Earth_?"

"That was my reaction, when the Liara and the Illium doctors brought you in and told me."

"Illium doctors?"

She sighed. "Like I said, Commander, there's a lot you've missed." She began to make her way out of the room. "I'm not the one who should fill you in, though. Liara's on her way."

"How soon do you think she'll get here?"

"Oh, knowing her, I'd say less than an hour. She's not off-world, you know. She's right here in London. Can't stand being too far from you, that one."

The door sealed behind Chakwas. Shepard's heart soared at this news. Her headache was no longer relevant. Her thoughts clouded with impatience to kiss Liara's sweet lips again.


	2. Chapter 2

"Commander," Chakwas spoke through the intercom, "Liara's here. Sending her up now."

"Thank you, Doctor."

Minutes later, Liara appeared in the doorway, stepping into the room slowly and stiffly, as if she were fighting gravity. She wore a long, form-fitting grey and navy blue dress which accentuated her figure. Upon meeting Shepard's eyes, her own filled with tears immediately.

"Shepard…"Liara's voice was barely audible. The door closed automatically behind her as she entered. At that moment, the click of that door, the entire galaxy faded away.

"It's good to see you, Liara."A sense of calmness and serenity filled Shepard, her eyes glistening and her smile genuine.

Liara stepped closer to Shepard, her movements slow at first, and then grew exponentially in speed until she was sitting at the edge of Shepard's bed, leaning over her, and kissing her lips as tears fell from her eyes onto Shepard's cheeks. Their kisses were quick, deep, and constant, with hunger and passion enough to fuel a million stars. As minutes passed, they slowed and became more elaborate.

Liara was the first to finally pull away. "I've missed you, Shepard. This morning I woke up wondering if I would ever speak to you again, and now… here you are."

"Here we are," Shepard smiled, then planted a quick kiss on her forehead.

"It was the worst feeling…" her voice plunged further into melancholy, "torn between waiting for you to wake up, and forgetting about you. But how could I forget, when… when—"

"Liara," Shepard said softly with reassuring eyes, "it's okay. It's all over. I'm here now, and I'm never leaving again."

Liara smiled slightly. "I know." She sat up and took hold of Shepard's hand.

Earlier that day, Chakwas estimated that Liara wouldn't take more than an hour to arrive. However, it had taken her three. "What took you so long to get here, Liara?"

"I'm sorry. I wanted to arrive as soon as possible, but there were a few complications."

"Like what?"

"It's not important. Being the Shadow Broker can take a toll on your spare time, that's all." Liara quickly changed the subject. "I imagine you want me to catch you up on the things you've missed. Do you have any questions in particular?"

"Tell me everything that happened since the Reapers were destroyed. From your perspective."

Liara's expression shifted, looking uneasy for a moment, attempting to formulate thoughts. "Well, there were no sufficient hospitals or clinics to take care of such severe injuries. So we initially had to go to Illium to get you proper medical care. They were barely scraped by the Reapers compared to most other places in the galaxy. We debated many different places, but Illium was the most promising since I still keep in touch with my old contacts. I knew I would be able to fit you into any hospital. They were the ones who performed the initial diagnosis, which was later confirmed by Doctor Chakwas upon your arrival here in London."

"What led to me being back on Earth?"

"About a year later, the reconstruction of Earth had finally taken a major step of progress. This hospital was among the finest built. I initiated the transfer. I knew waking up on Earth would mean a lot to you. Since then, I've lived in an apartment close to this hospital. I picked it out specifically for that reason, of course. Being close to you is my priority."

Shepard smiled and gently caressed her cheek.

Liara let out a slight chuckle. "It's funny. When we met, I didn't know at all how to interact with humans. I never imagined I would be living on their homeworld. But the humans have been very kind to me. Especially James and Samantha—" In the middle of her sentence, she silently looked away with an air of discomfort.

"Really?" Shepard smiled slightly, curious about her old friends. "How've they been? Do they know I'm awake?"

"I… I don't know for sure. Samantha was living here in London relatively closeby, but she went off-world a few weeks ago to help rebuild her home colony. James has been on Earth assisting in the rebuilding efforts. He lives in New York."

"What about Ash?"

"Ashley's been the only living human Spectre. She has many responsibilities, mostly assisting Admiral Hackett in overseeing the reconstruction efforts. She hasn't left Earth since the Reapers were destroyed—"

The door reopened and Chakwas stepped inside. "I'm sorry, I hate to interrupt. I wanted to give you time to adapt, but I'm afraid I can't put this off any longer. Shepard, may I tell you your medical diagnosis now?"

"Of course, Doctor. And I appreciate your consideration."

Chakwas raised her arm and pressed a few buttons on her omni-tool. A screen was projected, from which she read off of. "'Severe burning of the skin on the forearms, neck, and face. Moderate bone fracture in the jaw, minor bone fractures in the pelvis, and left ribs. Severe bruising in the abdominal area.' It seems as though you suffered an explosion of some sort."

"Yes," Shepard replied, remembering herself shooting the red tube in the Crucible. "The last thing I remember before waking up was fire… just fire."

"But," Liara began, "then how did we find you on Earth?"

"I've got no idea."

"Shepard," Chakwas said while eyeing her omni-tool intently, "you also had injuries that suggest a direct impact, not relating to the blast. 'Bruising of the arms, legs, and right ribs, minor fracture of the right knee, and severe skull fracture.' The head trauma is what caused your coma. If you piece everything together, what happened was that you experienced a blast, which caused the burns, which you attempted to shield with left side of your body, causing the blast-related bone fractures, which were all on the left side of your body. The blast knocked you unconscious and you fell to the ground on the right side of your body, which caused the bruising and the fractures which were primarily on that side of your body."

"That makes sense, but it still doesn't explain how I ended up back on Earth. I mean, I couldn't have just fallen back onto Earth. No upgrades Cerberus could have given me could enable me to survive that."

Chakwas shrugged, then continued to examine the readings. "Fortunately for you, three years is a long time to heal. However, your bones may still be a bit sensitive, so be careful. You may feel some soreness for a little while due to your returned mobility. I don't recommend exercising for a while. Other than that, everything should be alright."

"Wait," Shepard said hopefully, "does this mean I'm free to go?"

"Not just yet," Chakwas said while operating her omni-tool, "we've still got a few more examinations to run before you're up and around. Should be about a week."

Shepard and Liara expressed their thankfulness to Doctor Chakwas before she left the room. Liara turned back toward Shepard, her eyes filled with a calm delight, but with a small undertone of sadness. Shepard sat up and wrapped her arms around Liara, resting her head on her shoulder. For a while they sat there, lost deep in thought. Shepard stared out the window with a slight smile, whereas Liara looked down with a worried expression on her face. Her eyes began to water, but she closed her eyes tightly, trying to fight off the tears. Over time, she was no longer to keep them restrained and they began to cascade down from her eyes. Shepard immediately took notice.

"What's the matter?" Her voice was concerned and gentle.

"No," Liara shook her head, "it's just…I can't do this right now."

"What?"

Liara stood up and faced Shepard, who now looked less concerned than perplexed. "I just need… time, Shepard. I'll be alright in a few days, I just have to get used to all of this, and…" She began to make her way slowly towards the door.

"Liara, wait—"

"I'm sorry, Shepard." Liara stopped and turned towards her again, her expression exhausted and painful. "I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed right now. I promise you that in a few days it'll be alright, and I'll tell you everything. I just need time."

She began continued walking, until Shepard insisted again. "Liara, wait. What aren't you telling me?"

Liara stopped walking and stood still in the open doorway. With her back facing Shepard, she only turned her head slightly to the side. "In time, Shepard. _Please_." She continued her slow steps once again, and eventually the door closed behind her.

Shepard remained still for a few moments, wondering the extent of what she really missed during the past three years. She sighed and turned to look out the window once again. The sun remained strong and warm, but rain also fell. In the distance, she could see small children playing, laughing and squinting their eyes at the sun while trying to catch the rain with their mouths.


	3. Chapter 3

Shepard expected the rest of the day to be quiet and still, with only the doctors passing through. But only a short hour after Liara's departure, she heard Chakwas again on the intercom.

Minutes later, two good friends appeared in the doorway. One of them threw his muscular arms outwards and shouted "Lola!" loud enough for the doctors in the corridor to turn their heads. He waltzed into the room and briefly put a friendly yet firm arm around Shepard and patted her back. "Good to see you up, Shepard!" he exclaimed enthusiastically.

"James," Shepard chuckled at his dramatic entrance. "It's good to see you. You too, Steve."

"Likewise, Shepard," Steve said, entering the room displaying his usual calm demeanor, "It's great to have you back."

James sat himself at the edge of Shepard's bed, with Steve standing beside him.

Shepard's eyebrows narrowed for a moment. "James, I thought Liara said you were living in New York. What brings you to London?"

He stirred for a few seconds. "I've… been helping out around here. You know, with… stuff."

"Stuff." Shepard mimicked him with sarcasm, expecting him to elaborate.

"Construction efforts. Helping Earth get back to the way it was. You know."

"So you've been working with Ashley?" Shepard was hopeful for more news of her old friend. "Liara told me she's overseeing Earth's reconstruction."

"Yeah, yeah, she's doing fine—"

Steve interrupted suddenly. "Why don't we get to that stuff later?" He shot a quick glance at James with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, Commander," James complied, quickly returning Steve's glance before turning back to Shepard. "How are you feeling?"

They conversed briefly about Shepard's injuries and current state of being. Then James and Steve described their general lives during the past three years; both had been contributing to the reconstruction efforts, but also taking time to relax and enjoy themselves. James said had been spending most of his time at nightclubs in New York. He told Shepard that once she's finally up and around, he'd finally buy her a round of drinks as he'd promised her years ago. Steve said he was spending most of his time visiting tropical places. Shepard smiled, glad he was finally treating himself to relaxation.

She asked about the old crew. Garrus went to Palaven almost immediately after the war to spend time with his family and help rebuild, and they hadn't seen or heard much from him since. The turians are recovering quickly. Tali lives on Rannoch and they haven't seen her since the war ended. She finally has the house on her homeworld of her dreams and she's been assisting in agriculture and construction. In the past few years, the population of Rannoch has skyrocketed. Wrex and Eve returned to Tuchanka, married, and together they lead the Krogan race, who have been relatively peaceful since the cure of the genophage.

Eventually James and Steve took their leave, the conversation dying down, as the only thing they had left in common was the past, which was unmentionable and rather forgotten. Shepard was uneasy, feeling as if there was something that was intentionally unspoken.

* * *

"Shepard."

"Ashley," Shepard smiled at her as she stood in the open doorway, a few hours after James and Steve had left. "It's good to see you."

Ashley stepped into the room, the door closing behind her, and sat at the edge of Shepard's bed. "It's good to see you, Commander."

"Likewise, Ash. How come Chakwas didn't let me know she was sending you up?"

"I'm a Spectre, Shepard. I don't exactly need to check in at the front desk."

"Right. How's that going for you?"

Ashley looked away from Shepard and leaned over, placing her elbows on her knees and putting a fist into her hand, which she held up to her chin to keep herself balanced. "Honestly? Tiring. I've hardly had time to visit my family. I was lucky to even be able to come see you this month, let alone the day you woke up. I have the upmost respect for Admiral Hackett, but he really strains me with all the responsibilities he throws at me. I'm overseeing the rebuilding of our entire homeworld. That's a lot of pressure, Shepard. And a lot of work."

"I imagine it would be," Shepard said empathetically. "I heard James was helping out here in London. He said he's working with you."

Ashley's right eyebrow raised. "I haven't seen James in about a year, Commander… I was working with him for a while, yeah, but not since sometime last year. Since we've made so much progress, we've been giving Alliance soldiers permission to take time off for themselves and leaving the construction efforts to actual construction workers."

"That's strange," Shepard rubbed her chin in thought, "why would he lie about that?"

"Beats me, Commander."

Shepard was lost in thought for a brief moment. "So about the reconstruction efforts, do you think that they'd keep some of the pressure off of you and give me some of the work? Now that I'm back?"

Ashley's eyes lit up. "Oh, I—uh… I honestly never thought about that, Commander. But don't you need time to recover?"

"Not really. Three years is a long time for physical injuries to heal."

"Well, I guess if you wouldn't—" Ashley paused and looked to the ground, her eyes focused and her face tense. "Thank you, Shepard, really, but… you deserve time to relax."

"And you _don't_?" Shepard said with a slight tone of anger.

"No, no, it's just…" Ashley began fidgeting. "You probably have other things to worry about…" Her voice trailed off.

"I do?" Shepard's expression showed genuine confusion. "Like what?"

Ashley was taken aback. Her expression tensed and she raised her posture. "Wow… you really have no idea?" There was a long pause, as if she were expecting Shepard to suddenly recall what she was talking about. But she saw Shepard's still, worried face, and continued with words that were soft and almost judgmental. "She really didn't tell you?"

"Ash, what are you talking about? Who didn't tell me wh—wait," she froze, her expression lit up with curiosity, "does this have anything to do with Li—"

"Ash," a familiar voice blared in on Ashley's omni-tool. "Did you get a chance to see Shepard?"

"Yeah," Ashley replied, her expression and voice slowly transitioning from the tone of the last conversation into this one. "I'm with her right now. She can hear you."

"Hey, Commander!" He nearly shouted.

"Hey, Joker," Shepard smiled, thinking of her old friend. "You coming to visit soon?"

"We've been off world, but as soon as we heard you woke up, we plotted a course to Earth. We'll be there by tomorrow morning."

"Who's 'we'?"

"EDI, and I, of course."

Shepard froze for a moment before shouting, "Wait, _what?_"

"I said, 'EDI and I, of course'," Joker said sarcastically, "jeez, is the reception bad or something? Say hi, EDI."

"Hello, Shepard," EDI spoke as Shepard expression grew more and more surprised, "I am relieved that you've regained consciousness."

"Hey, EDI," Shepard said slowly.

"Glad to have you back, Shepard. See you tomorrow." Joker ended the transmission.

Ashley was puzzled by Shepard's reaction to EDI. "What's the matter, Commander?"

Shepard changed the subject. "Just out of curiosity, Ash, how've the geth been doing?"

"Great," Ashley grew even more puzzled, "They're practically the quarian's new best friends. So many quarians live on their homeworld today, due in most part to the geth's assistance."

Shepard shook her head in disbelief.

Before Ashley could inquire, she began to receive incoming messages marked urgent. Upon opening and reading them, she sighed. "I've got to get back to work, Shepard. We'll stay in touch, okay?"

"Alright. Take care, Ash."

Ashley smiled back at Shepard before she turned and left the room with a steady, rushed walk, her eyes focused on her omni-tool.

Once again, the Catalyst's words rang in Shepard's head:

_The Crucible will not discriminate. All synthetics will be targeted. _

EDI? Shepard thought. The geth? How can they still be here? The quarians know better than to attempt to recreate the geth, and even if they did, that doesn't explain EDI…

_Even you are partly synthetic._

Shepard knew that the survival of the synthetics and her own survival was something to be happy about. She should have viewed the situation as a wonderful miracle. But she knew better. She knew that it never should have happened.

She knew that something was wrong. Something was _very_ wrong.


End file.
